Blessing's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[[KK] XXX phineas&ferb XXX]

OOOOOOOOOp

I want to do things to you now. Pleasurable things.

Charcoal125 responds:

you mean like sticking your dildo like head into my succulent vagina. And I don't mean you, ferb, because you are a pathetic piece of fuck and your head is too thin, that would be making it way too easy for me, I want fin e as to be my personal vaginal insertion device, but not at an angle so that the corner of his head goes in first, but the flat top of his head, making his eyes slither into me at first, and the entire cranium onto my queefer, and soon into it.with his extremely disfigured triangle like head very quickly shooting into my cunt, causing near fatal ruptures that I will close using staples, forcing him to spend 3 weeks trapped inside of my womb, getting only the air that I allow to let him breathe, through a long straw that is connected to my asshole so that whenever I have to fart, that's the only air that he will be able to breathe. I will be sure to only eat the most rancid imaginable foods for the next three weeks, to make this that much more pleasurable for the both of us.

["Snowfall"]

Um...

I sort of admired this until I got to the end of your author's comments. Pretending you don't know who Calvin and Hobbes are when almost EVERY expression your boy made in this flash mirrors Calvin right down to the line is just irritating. On top of that, it would take two seconds to google Calvin and Hobbes, and you can't expect people to actually explain it to you in the review space, which means there are only two possible reasons you would have asked that question in your author's comments:

1. A poor attempt at humor as you silently give credit where it's due and admit that your art was HEAVILY influenced by the comic, or

2. A desperate and overly obvious attempt to make people think you don't know who Calvin and Hobbes are.

Strangely enough, in your other flashes where people don't look like Calvin none of them make the extreme expressions that the boy in this made over the littlest things. Even when their mood changes heavily they don't do any of the outlined eye, different pupil shape things that you displayed here, that Calvin often does. Why is that?

The animation was reasonably smooth, though I would have gone with different music. The music was much too tranquil for the chaos that was going on. The controls were a nice touch too. I just can't believe it kills you to say "Yeah, I really liked his art style and it influenced me here and there." I suppose you gave birth to yourself too, so good job on that.

DonkeysBazooka responds:

hmm... yeah, that could be

OR

3. I know very well who Calvin and Hobbes are, they were very obviously an inspiration to me and the art style, and I was making a joke at the end of the author's comments because 95% of all of these reviews mention Calvin and Hobbes.

but I guess that joke just flies right over some people's heads. particularly people who find the author's comments more important than the actual flash.

so good job on that

[Nicolas Cage Wants Cake]

My god...

I wanted to hate this. As soon as I realized it would be some sound clip music mishmosh piece of garbage I wanted to hate it. But it's... Entrancing. I don't know what it was exactly. The rhythm was nice. The sound clips were well chosen. The animation was very smooth and the gestures were so... Right. My mind is still numb, I can't put into words how much I liked this video. I want that cake.

[WGJ4K: Mario Vs Sonic]

Deceptive.

Your art is good and I typically like your work, however I don't think it's right to title a flash "Mario vs Sonic" and have the only connection to mario or sonic in the flash be the fact the the two characters are, for reasons unknown, dressed as the respective characters. I wish that at least in your author's comments you would have warned us that it has virtually nothing to do with an actual mario and sonic showdown, to spare us the soulcrushing disappointment. I really think you should have left the weird outfits out of it and just tried to sell this flash for what it was: two guys fighting. It kind of feels like you're just trying to get a higher score by riding the coattails of already established characters in name alone, which isn't a good thing. You have skill, you don't need to resort to stuff like this. :/

[Super Smash]

Clever...

A lot of people assume this is your first attempt at animation and I think that's why they're so blown away. Don't get me wrong, this is amazing, but when you say "this is my first flash" people don't bother to check your site and see that you've been working with animation for quite some time and that's how you've become so good. You definitely should put a preloader in your next one, it really doesn't take long and it's not hard to do, I'm a little surprised that you don't have on on this flash considering the fact that you seem to have learned a good deal about flash. Also the animation was a bit sporadic and choppy in some parts which made the action kind of hard to follow, work on that too. Your art style is really great though and your interpretations of the characters were pretty fresh and entertaining. Keep at it. How long did this take?

[hugs are good]

Douches are bad.

The humor had its moments and since it was supposed to be a funny piece the crappy art and animation didn't bother me much. It fit. It shouldn't have ended with to be continued though, the guy should have just died. This doesn't have series potential and you kinda raped it with that ending. Luckily, before I voted too high I read your author's comments in which you bitch at people for using their review space to review, such as pointing out that the bad art is bad art. If you can't handle criticism you REALLY shouldn't be putting anything on newgrounds. If you feel you must, then you should try putting more than a day's half-assed effort into it. Or better yet, grow a pair and accept that people are going to comment on flaws that you yourself realize are painfully obvious. Even if this was the most stunning thing ever conceived someone is going to hate it and blow every little mistake out of proportion. If you can't deal with that, go ahead and slit your wrists because someone doesn't adore the piece of shit that you didn't put effort into. This flash wasn't terrible, but because of your author's comments I sincerely hate you enough to come back and vote 0 on this every day for the rest of newgrounds.com's life. I hope we meet in real life seconds before you're hit by a meteor that gives you cancer.

Sethdd responds:

Its useless critisism if I already know it... so I was just letting people know that, I know the animation sucks, its supposed too, and I wanted people to review the voice acting, not the animation... and plus you are calling me a douche, yet you are the one who looks like a complete douche right now, no one else was offended but you, and I am sorry if it did offend you, because that was not my intention, the update was more or less a joke, of course I dont think that everyone on newgrounds are a bunch of homos lol, and if you didnt notice I already said that I love each and every newgrounder, so I don't know why you are so annoyed for some reason....

Everyone has their own sense of humour, and mine may be different then yours, we all come from different backgrounds, and even different religions... So don't be hating on my author comments when they were just meant to be a joke...

[Takuto - Episode 1]

Good for what it was, not so much for Newgrounds.

Kind of an interesting piece of literature. This will probably come to be a good story (though some of the lines sound like it's been written by an overeager 5 year-old telling someone about imaginationland, try to be more objective in your wording) but as a flash "animation" it leaves quite a bit to be desired. A few sketchy drawings of landscapes that don't seem to connect with the text too deeply and some music that quickly began to irritate me as I was reading are all that seem to separate this from just a page of text on a website. To be perfectly honest I think you could make it work better as just that, text on a website. I would assume that you're keeping the animation to an absolute minimum so that you can meet your deadline, but I feel that it would greatly help your future submissions. If you are still strongly against the idea of animation, consider using more illustrations and making them correlate a little more with what the reader is reading. Maybe show Takuto in a couple of them too.

MarkHansAvon responds:

Thanks for you responses/reviews everyone. I promise I have, in return for your time, taken every suggestion into fair and equal consideration.

Thanks again for your time. =)

[Stamp on the Ground]

You should...

Mention the characters in the credits or something so I know who I'm looking at, and because they're someone else's property and it's the right thing to do. Most people probably don't realize that the blonde person in green is a woman, I myself didn't. Your art style is nice, I really like it cause it's quirky, but it does leave a good bit of your characters looking androgynous. Like the poor little he/she/it with its parents at the beginning and end of the flash. No idea which way it goes.

Other than that my only complaint is that Ness needs about 10 times as much screen time as you gave him. Ness beats everything.

[Zelda: UO Epis:8]

Much better than certain other...

...Zelda flashes I've seen lately. I remember watching some of the earlier episodes of your series. I admire that you've stuck with it this long and that you're at this level. This flash was really well done. I wish the fight was slightly longer though. I'll have to watch the earlier episodes that i missed to see when Link became a sim (get it? the green gem it... ah nevermind). The end amused me, your voice actors seem to mess up a loooooooot. Good stuff though. I eagerly await the episode where Diggs is kidnapped and chained up in a dungeon where he's repeatedly stabbed and dismembered, somehow surviving longer than any man should, begging for the sweet embrace of death as endless waves of agony pulsate through his body until finally his wish is granted and following one final, violent, involuntary spasm as he hemorrhages oceans of blood and reflects mentally on his own douchiness, he leaves this world to spend an eternity roasting in the hottest corner of Hyrulian Hell.