Blessing's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Access Granted - Part 1]

If only this wasn't sticks.

This was very entertaining to watch. I look forward to the next one. My advice is to either use an audio program to normalize the volume of your lines, or edit the volume of the music and stuff so that it's a little quieter because it was a bit difficult to hear what was being said. Obviously, I think this would be better if it wasn't sticks too, but if that's your style that's your style and you run with it. Again, good stuff, needs louder lines but otherwise awesome. Hope to see episode 2 soon.

[The Office Theme for Luis]

I see...

I don't really like the office but I put that aside for now. This is just a video of you playing a song. This is something for youtube and not Newgrounds. I was willing to ignore that fact and give you a passing score out of pity, but you end it with a retarded "fuck you" (that seems like you're either honestly retarded, speak english terribly, or you're extremely embarrassed and ashamed because you realize this is the stupidest possible thing you could do and yet you do it anyway). This honestly makes me hate you as a human being. So, in honor of your flash, "Fuh Koooooooooooooooooo" too. You get a 0.

Reyals responds:

Yes, I'm mentally challenged. And I would have gotten away with it to if it weren't for you meddling kids!

[Metal Gay Solid]

I think I know why.

I'm sure that you and your friends were very hurt and disappointed that Mr. Utah did not select your piece. "He... Ungh... He doesn't know what real humor is!" You probably told your friend as he pounded your rectum with his man-meat. "Oh... Yeah, you're the first person to... TAKE ALL OF ME!!... You're the first person to make a gay joke about Raiden, maybe he's just afraid of how... I'M IN-FRIGGIN-SIDE YOU!!!... How original and fresh your humor is." Your friend probably replied, releasing his seed deep in your innards.

The fact that you would make this alone speaks volumes, but that you would submit it by itself when it was just a failed piece of a collab really shows that you have a lot of gay, I mean guts. I don't think that your character was really developed enough for us, the viewing audience to know much. As a result it was hard to feel truly attached. We learned that you love the game and think that it can't get any better when there's a naked man being displayed, but aside from that you're a closed book. Another factor that may work against you is the audio. In the part where you become so aroused by the man-to-man sex that your nervous system gets confused and ejaculates from your mouth instead of your genitals, your noises of unrivaled ecstasy are a bit distorted and fuzzy, as if you were maybe too close to the mic.

You're not a bad artist though, so don't commit suicide or anything.

[we are the ONE]

Why?

Why make a preview 5 days before the release of a flash? And why not put "preview" or "trailer" or "not the full movie, this is a short announcement that it's coming" in the title? This has decent art (though I'm pretty sure it's just a 3d program) and nice enough audio but it's just a waste of time, put more effort into finishing the flash faster, then you don't need a trailer at all.

[Zelda: UO Epis:6]

Not bad.

PROS: Nice artwork, decent animation, interesting plot, great music, half of the voices.

CONS: Malon's voice, Diggs and Kogora(?) both have the "any situation is a joke to me" attitude that generally becomes irritating with more than one character, the delivery of some of Diggs' lines was rather corny, plot seemed to move along a little slow, this episode was low on action, Tingle was in this, half of the voices.

And though this didn't affect my choice of score, the way you pronounced Malon like "Mall-on" was a little weird to me. Everyone I know calls her "Mal-on" like "Mal Gore" or "Malabama". Just a personal preference I suppose, but interesting to note. I look forward to the next one.

[Tamra]

HE'S REAL?!?

OMG!! YOUR TRUE STORY INCLUDES A SCENE WITH SUPERMAN!!! I KNEW HE WAS REAL!!!

Seriously though, this was really beautiful. I don't even like that song much but this flash was really really great. It's wonderful that you guys found each other. Really well made.

[Radiohead - Creep]

Not that great...

I really love this song but I absolutely hate this performance of it. The art is good and I can tell that a lot of work went into this flash, no doubt, but the content of the video seems a poor choice for this video. You should have maybe shown pictures of the girl about whom he sings or shown him reflecting on it or something or being in more than one location and not fitting in anywhere, something to tie in with the lyrics better. Like I said, this clearly wasn't finished in a day or two, you put some hard work into this so I'm taking that into consideration with my scoring, but the choice of content and what is perhaps the worst, lowest quality performance of this song I've ever heard, prevents me from giving you high marks.

[Blue Red Ninjas 2]

Nice!

It loads and then gives me a notice screen about it being stolen. After reading it 3 times and looking for the button to proceed, then right clicking and realizing i couldn't click a play, I gave up on this horrible creation. Dick move to make the filesize so big for a one screen piece of shit. Die in a fire.

Show-R-Studios responds:

all i feel is pitty for you, you cant even mkae one good flash movie...tleast this movie got a green good rating, i feel sorry that a person whos been on NG so long is a complete asshole. Sorry that you make fun of others because you cant get anywhere
-show

[Freezepop's JEM!]

Hmm...

Well I don't much like this video so I'm going to try to explain why and hopefully this review won't be deleted for being "abusive" simply because I don't orgasm over your work (as virtually every review of something I didn't like has been). The song I hated. It was not my cup of tea. While I wouldn't call it "gay" like one recent reviewer did, the way you danced and "sang" the song appeared a bit feminine, but I'm going to assume that was the point so as to be funny.

To be fair, I could picture myself enjoying this song a little if it was on DDR or something (was it on amplitude? I know there was some freezepop song) but I'm pretty sure this isn't the kind of music I'd sit and listen to for fun. All that said, my review isn't based on the hatred of the song. If the song was made by you I think it would factor into my vote but I've in fact wasted countless seconds of your life by rambling on about this song that has no impact on my vote instead. That was fun. What did impact my vote about the song was the sound quality, it was bad. I know it's probably compression to keep the filesize down, but the "singing into a can underwater" thing is still just as bad no matter what the reason behind it. So you lose some points for that.

You lose more points with me for a lack of preloader. I can't vote 5 for anything without a preloader. Considering the fact that all the work is done for you and you can download a preloader from this very site, that's just laziness on your part which is a bit of a slap in the face. Another thing I didn't like was that this was a video, not a flash per se. There's youtube for that, I don't think Newgrounds needs a flood of crappy videos from puberty-ridden teens with cameras who fill 4 and a half minutes with jokes that are only funny to the very person telling the joke.

The dances, while very feminine as I said before, you did have a lot of energy so you score some points with me there. Go you. The lip sync is off in a few places though. It would have been worth it for the reshoot. Overall, this is a nice little "boy dances to song" video like those asian guys who sing backstreet boys songs, but this just isn't much of a Newgrounds flash and I think the score reflects that. I know you said this is your first video so I will say "Good effort, don't give up regardless of how this does. Listen to the reviews and they will help you improve." but I'm not going to give some sympathy score simply because it's your first flash. Being a first flash doesn't magically make it better. It's um... Outrageous though.

[The Madness Code 2]

Good News and Bad News

The good news is it's just as good as the countless sequels by Krinkels himself. The bad news is that this series jumped the shark after the first or second flash. It was cool at first but it's been done to death and it's never anything new. Poorly drawn motion tweened puppet guys fighting with decently drawn weapons. High body count, low effort. Dialog? Plot? Who needs these things. "Hero wants to kill Villain. Kills several people in different rooms with different guns but the same basic appearance. Subtract any realism, originality, character development, or plot twists. Add fight with clown and/or bearded man. Die. Repeat in sequel."

DP responds:

There was no motion tweening in this, but i think that if you think it is as good as the madness sequels than give it their scores.